Went home for lunch. Lathen and I had a nooner. Wow, it's been forever since we've done it in daylight!

I have a desperate need to catch up on last weekend because so much happened, both physically and spiritually for me. I apologize for going back in time here, but I do need to blog about my Sunday. ~~ It began quite nicely as Lathen and I set out to meet his family at Mahoney State Park for dinner in celebration of his brother's 20th birthday. That, in itself, was quite uneventful except for the typical spatting between Lathen's brother and Sister. Flashbacks to adolescence are good for the soul. Afterwards, we stopped by the SAC (Strategic Air Command) Museum. I've been wanting to check that place out for quite some time but I was a bit taken aback with my reaction to the displays. I have always regarded war with the utmost disdain, but I respect those who have served and I can understand one's feeling of duty and, of course, pledge allegience to what this Country at least attempts to stand for in its fight for Democracy for all. You'll have to excuse me, as I am neither educated nor well read on the subject of war, knowing only of the general concepts, those including death and destruction. As I walked underneath the enormous wings of the old fighter planes and ducked inside to stand in the actual bomb compartment, I cannot explain the mixture of fear, adrenaline and sadness that filled my being. There were certain areas where I stood that I literally had to walk away from because it was as if I were experiencing all of the terrible emotions and resulting death and destruction that was caused by that very aircraft within which I stood. I didn't realize what was going on at the time; I assumed my discomfort was from exhaustion and lack of understanding of the aircrafts but now I'm sure these feelings were the result of lingering energies left from who-knows-what and I was feeling them. The worst part was near the Vietnam display. I couldn't even look at the entire thing because tears began streaming down my face and I had to walk away to hide my sobs. Luckily, there was a kite display going on and I was able to regain composure there amongst the beautiful kites. My wonderful Lathen soon came searching for me and I felt better once I was near him. I know this may all sound crazy, but I report here only my very own personal feelings. I must now decide whether to absorb or sqeeze and, quite frankly, I'm not sure which to do. Holding on to life's tragedies can't be healthy, so for now, I'll squeeze.