A relationship-driven girl's story of realization, acceptance, anticipation and maybe even a little joy
Until about a year ago......
things seemed... well... I said "perfect" out loud a lot. But, as I continued to educate myself, not only in the classroom, but in my very own little psyche, there began a faint smoldering of dissatisfaction and the more it grew, the hotter it became and the more it burned. Looking back now, I think that little spark could have been extinguished, had I not been anticipating and expecting such nascence in my life. But instead, as I sat there, feeling stuck, the spark grew into a flame which was soon dangerously out of control. I did get a handle on it and, for a time, I stopped it from spreading. But just as I feared, it was only temporarily. It soon began to engulf me again. I finally had no choice but to submerge myself in deep water in an attempt to completely destroy that damn flame. This was soothing at first, but before I knew it, I was drug to to the surface and dumped there, cold and alone. And with my burns exposed, the pain began. "Why me?" I would sob to myself. And feeling only the cold, wetness of being alone and the pain of my burns, all I could see were the dark path behind me that led me here in the first place, or back into the cold, dark water as a means to escape these horrifying feelings. After trying to stand up and turning around, I was horrified to discover that the path at my back had already disappeared. So, almost without thinking, I jumped back into the water where I treaded for quite some time. I soon grew tired, though, of being wet and cold and futile. Looking around, I saw the ladder and surprised myself when I felt a little bit of hope. I pulled myself out. I remained cold and wet for awhile, but I have begun to feel some warmth. I've realized the sun is, actually, shining. And, now that my eyes have been drawn away from the water below me and toward the sky, I see that there are a few ships out there. These ships are there to take me someplace. I wanna get on a ship.
