When Lathen left me, I sent an email to all my friends with the heads-up. Most of them thought it was a joke, but when they realized it wasn't I was blessed with many caring responses. Whenever I feel sad and start to miss Lathen, I read those responses from my beautiful and wonderful friends and I always feel better. What follows is my little sister's response. Beki: she's 22, married with a two-year-old, and she is so cute! Today, this one helped - a lot:

Hey! Well, to tell you the truth ever since this whole thing happened I knew it was the right thing. Lathen is a really nice guy and I know your relationship was good with him, but I just couldn't see him settling down and being a family man, which I think you want in a guy, right? He had plenty of opportunity to change, but didn't. He could've found a different job, so that you could spend more time ogether. If you would've stayed together I think the future for you guys would've brought you further and further apart and you would've been more and more unhappy. I get so mad at {husband's name deleted] because he always wants to go hunting, fishing, golfing, lift weights, or something or other. But I can't imagine him never being around, that would be very hard and I can imagine what you were going through. I know you are the type of person that doesn't like to be alone, the right guy is out there. Don't get discouraged, you're young and have a long time ahead of you. Beleive me once you start a family and have kids there is no turning back. And you wouldn't feel like there is no good in you, that is ridiculous Mollie. I think you just need to refocus and realize that this kindof thing happens to everyone in one way or another and everyone gets through there tough times. I know in 5 years you'll look back on this whole thing and laugh, but right now it's OK to cry. I hope this doesn't sadden your day I hope it brightens it, because it should...and its FRIDAY!!! Love, Beki

After work last night, I headed to the grocery store. When I returned to my apartment, I felt a bit of despair when there were no messages on my home answering machine! In addition, I had no plans and was forced into aloneness for the first time since the breakup. It sucked. Especially considering I don't even have cable hooked up yet. I went and worked out, returned to messageless apartment. I had rented "Moulan Rouge" the other night and stuck that in. What a terrible movie!! I watched about 15 minutes worth and had to turn it off. But don't take my word for it. Judge for yourself. About 10:00, Loren called. He has his 7-year-old son this week, but still subtly invited me over. I, of course, accepted, and took with me another movie - "Evolution". Again, a bad movie, but I enjoyed the company anyway. I'm getting mixed signals from Loren. But then again, I'm sure I'm sending them, as well. I decided not to stay over, and returned home after the movie. Good news? I was happier. Slept soundly. Today will be better.